Study: 38 Percent Of People Not Actually Entitled To Their Opinion

CHICAGO—In a surprising refutation of the conventional wisdom on opinion entitlement, a study conducted by the University of Chicago's...

JoelNotes

As suggested by this NYT article
if I had to list all of the novels that I thought were too long -

The Scarlet Letter - whole thing in one headline: PURITAN SLEEPS WITH REVEREND, BORES 11TH GRADERS FOR YEARS TO COME
A Tale of Two Cities - Dickens was paid by the installment (chapter)...and it shows.
One Hundred Years of Solitude - Enjoyed most of the book, but could have done without the last two decades.
Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire - did Hermione really have to campaign for house elves' rights? How would that help fight Voldemort?
The DaVinci Code - Monty Python's search for the Holy Grail is better.
Ayn Rand - anything she's written. Why did I have so many copies of the Fountainhead as a 1st year?
The March - As long as the Civil War.
Finnegan's Wake - I still haven't finished reading it...

Can't sleep, clown'll eat me.

Just for exposition's sake, I was staying over at my cousin's house over the weekend and slept in their basement, which was also their kids' playroom. Both their kids being boys and under the age of five, the playroom was naturally littered with toys.

Ok, so the real story begins when I was getting ready to sleep when I heard this horrible, mechanical noise out in the darkness. Being groggy and having drank a fifth of bourbon earlier, I thought it was my imagination, so I went back to closing my eyes.

Like twenty minutes later, I heard the same mechanical, scratchy noise again, and could distinguish that it sounded like laughter. Another 10-15 minutes later, the same horrendous laughter again. I finally got up, trying to look for what this shit was, turned out the basement lights, and looked around. What grabbed my attention the most was this clown doll of my nephew's was lying on its side on the floor, but when
you pressed the button on its back, it made the same piercing laughter I had heard. Having seen horror movies about toys killing people, I threw the toy into a toy chest and slept in the family room under the pretense it was cold in the basement.

Now, I hadn't heard the clown toy before that night, so it couldn't have been a sound I would remember which leads me to wonder -
was it a) just my imagination and my psychosis playing tricks on me?
b) a mechanical failure of the toy?
c) the beginning of that creepy Stephen King novel?

So, yeah, to sum up this entry, Spring finals are done and possessed toys are haunting me.

Political Side: Don't agree with giving total amnesty in new immigration bill, but at least it takes care of better enforcement policies.
Personal Side: Congratulate my friend V for giving me further incentive to visit Chicago again.

Party Like Its 2008

Anyone else tired of the 2008 Election already? I dug up this old article of mine from three years back about the problems of the primary system today. What did most states do? Try to move up their primaries to earlier dates. My only mistake - what crack was I smoking when I picked Dick Gephardt?
"Primary system fails America"
http://maroon.uchicago.edu/viewpoints/articles/2004/01/20/primary_system_fails.php

If only U.S. presidential elections were chosen by the candidate who got the most items on a Scav Hunt list...one can dream.

Duck Soup Part II

Yes, I've been away from reporting my self-deprecating experiences in life. Not that it hasn't been as random or "Joelesque" as usual, but hey, I've been busy. I have finals. I have people to see and remark about the absurdity of life. For someone else's misadventures visit this site. He also has webcomics.

First, I still would like to send out my sympathies to the Virginia Tech campus for their courage and sacrifice these past two weeks. At first, I was concerned about reprisals against the Asian-American community, and in particular the Korean-American community, because of who the gunman was - which was a concern of many of my friends at BU. But, which reassured me about humanity, most people didn't want to pay attention to the images of the gunman and instead focused on grieving the victims, helping the survivors, and how to improve the outlets of mental health resources for the college students to be able to use.

On a different tangent, I have been mistaken for a different ethnicity in three different places this weekend (Fenway, Starbucks, Bed, Bath & Beyond). And it was by people of that ethnicity - like there was a Chinese-American woman asking me about bridal registry for her daughter? at Bed, Bath & Beyond. How many languages can you say - "I am Filipino, I'm sorry I can't speak your language." ?

It doesn't work to Babelfish the sentence. I have to be able to speak it phonetically. And how surprising is it for me to be mistaken for Indian?

All Look Same?

One more thing - Stupid Dice-K Mania in Boston
Do I look like the guy in this picture, or should the drunken Irish Bostonians take a lesson in racial sensitivity?
My favorite response so far
-"What do they think of Dice-K back in your home country?"
"Well, since the Japanese drove my family into hiding during WWII, we don't think highly of them."

Glad its not all in my family

Yeah, I'm back, but busy. I will have a blog page to regale you with stories about my many travels these last few weeks, but here's an entry with a family secret I would have rather never wanted to have known...
My dad dated a senator's daughter from Kentucky.
That senator lost to this current douchebag, who latest episode, while I disagrees with in idea, brings up the question - really do you want shitty acts like Black Eyed Peas and David Gray on your lawn?

Joel is Currently Unavailable...

as he will be traveling 6000 miles in the next two weeks, building houses in New Orleans for Katrina relief, improving his tolerance for Evangelicals, and bonding with his male cousins in Miami. He will be a living Johnny Cash song ("I've Been Everywhere", not "Ring of Fire.")

I'll keep you guys posted.

Luck of the Joelish

So St. Patrick's Day 2007 for me involved my nostrils being so filled with mucus that I couldn't breath, the city covered in snow, ice, and what the Weather Channel described as "undetermined precipitation," and studying for a midterm.

The week before was when I did most of my St. Paddy's day celebration at the Harpoon Brewery St. Pat's Festival. Not going to delve into the sordid details; but it ended up I being the relatively sober one in the party (screw you, Asian flush and my ALDH mutation!!), yet still being coerced into doing an Irish jig for a radio station t-shirt. And then being asked to have an Irish dance-off with someone else. And trying to remember if people were videotaping this and searching YouTube for any videos of a Filipino doing Riverdance for the past week.

I should have taken the dance-off challenge; they're so rare.
Somehow I do feel cheapened by this experience, but it is a nice t-shirt (WBOS 92.3). I didn't get a damn thing for this video 5 years ago.

So why am I afraid of a video now? Can't blame being a high-schooler like in this one.

Catholics have more fun...

I've decided to give up Youtube for Lent, if only because it's a distraction (an amusing one.)
Also, the Archbishop of Philadelphia posted videos about how we could doing more with our lives than watching Youtube, which while ironic - because then I wouldn't be watching his videos- convinced me I need to ween myself off Youtube.

Hey, if there is an afterlife, it's gotta be a lot of fun for Catholics...



New Topics for discussion: why the concept of arrythmias hates me
Ann Coulter vs. John Edwards - will this finally shut them up?

All that glitters isn't necessarily gold...

Unreleased Jimmy Page Guitar Riff To Be Retrieved From Secret Vault To Save Rock And Roll

Face it - a world where airplay has been conquered by Justin Timberlake deserves a rockapocalypse.

Stating the obvious

I've found out in the past week two of my ex-girlfriends are now engaged.

Yep, I'm so far unmarriageable.

Duck Soup

Non Sequitur of the week (and it's just Sunday):
So I was discussing with V about a mutual friend, who for the sake of his girlfriend, was trying not to associate him with the word sketchiness, even though he's had contests to see who is the sketchiest.
Me: If it looks like a duck, acts like a duck, sounds like a duck, it's a sketchy friend.
And then suddenly, an MBTA Cop came out from behind us and interjected,"So is it a duck?"
My stunned reply, "Yes... it's a duck."
Lesson - I need a softer outside voice.

Happy Chinese New Year everyone! (Year of the Pig for non-Asians).

I blame E! Stop the Histrionic Personalities.

1) Continuing secretarian violence and civil war in Iraq.
2) Democratic Congress challenging the Executive Branch on Constitutional war powers.
3) Palestinian coalition government still not officially recognizing Israel.
4) Escalation of offensive warfare from the Taleban in Afghanistan.
5) Nations meeting together to discuss how to stop global warming from worsening.
6) Iran being defiant on nuclear aims and its growing hegemony in the Persian Gulf.
7) Growing anti-immigrant sentiment in the United States.
8) Darfur peace talks stalled.
9) Aging baby boomers placing strain on the current health care system.
10) The 2008 Presidential primaries.

There. 10 relevant issues that deserve more press coverage than Anna Nicole Smith. The woman is dead, she didn't change America, and the course of this country will not divert knowing the father of her damn baby. GET OVER IT! I usually don't agree with Bill O'Reilly, but he's correct in pointing out the only value of her story is a warning about the irresponsibility of seeking attention. Don't start me on Britney Spears. Just go to obscurity in peace, woman.

Alexander Hamilton's Ghost is Shaking His Head at Me

Is there anyone out there, either of noble stock or born in the 18th Century, who wants to officiate a duel?

I forgot how this rake has impugned my dignity, but I know it shall not go unpunished.
His mistake that Boston Common is near the Charles shall also not go unpunished.

For anyone not interested in dueling, here's a comic strip demonstrating the cheap way of presenting in the science world.

Portrait of the Artist on Speed

riverrun. rivering run. river running running. trains running. rosebud was his sled. truck tires screech when stop. stop lights blinking. sirens wailing. must leave south boston. boston crazy. parents crazy. think i would randomly pick up lighted packages left on sidewalks. i know what aqua teen is. indonesian hobbits. p ≠ np? only the central time zone cares about this years super bowl. need whiskey - sour, mahattan, straight, neat, no rocks, no chaser. story of my life. boy meets girl. boy tutors girl. boy loses girl. cold. no snow. nhs4ever. minimum wage. bite and bark, but biting wrong people. caddy smells like trees. caddy's drawers are muddy. benjy i is gonna climb the fence. aughhhh! you see, william faulkner, its writing like that which is why youre burning in hell. like d lost generation books better. boats floating gatsby. running bulls in pamplona. chicago thinks i have money. alumni association hires friends from old house to track me down like a dog. cant even get own online account. weird. science. feel itchy - scratch-scratch-scratch - legs numb. nerst equation always there. med school cares about the nerst equation. got to her heart through the nerst equation. need sleep. badly. first sleep, then md diploma, then girlfriend, then kids, then revolution, then safecracking. explosions first sleep. wimper first, then bang. really wet and hot wimper.

Sign of the Apocalypse #3: Peyton Manning puts curse on Pats clutch, region of New England has winter of discontent

Why are my guy friends coming to me about their broken, dysfunctional relationship problems? I'm currently finding my love life is only existant when I'm in Chicago, and I can't afford flying back all the time, what with the Redline prices going up thanks to rising gas prices.


Point is I guess I'm just been more lucky with my personal life so far than some of my friends. All I can suggest to you all my buddies is to pray to St. All-the-people-I-know-as-single-and desperate-as-me-are -my-other-friends for intervention.

On a seperate note, congrats to Da Bears, and those 2 weeks between the NFC championship and the Super Bowl means Bears fans have a lot more time to do crazy, half-ass stuff, like giving birth.

Being Prepared

HERE LIES JOEL
LOVING SON, HUSBAND, FATHER

HE WAS JAKE BARNEY AND KEVIN TIRELLA'S
ONLY ROOMMATE TO BE FOUND
SLEEPING ON THE COUCH WEARING
BOXERS AND A FOOTBALL HELMET

This would be carved on my tombstone if my old roommates had their way. I suppose there are worse epitaphs, but sure as hell better ones.

Irony of Ironies

And now for something completely different from waxing about philosophies on a train ride.

The Augusta Chronicle and every other media source is discussing how James Brown's last testament and will was drawn up before his last marriage in 2001 and thus excludes his wife and 5-year son. Yeah, I'm concerned about the legacy and familial problems this will create... but get this - James Brown (Godfather of Soul, singer of "Say It Loud -- I'm Black and I'm Proud," had Al Sharpton as a tour manager) had Strom Thurmond Jr. as his probate lawyer. Yes, the son of that Strom Thurmond. The one NNDB officially lists as a "Racist senator/closet miscegenator." The one who ran for president in 1948 on a platform of segregation and in 1957 filibustered the Civil Rights Act. The one who Trent Lott lost his job to complimenting him.

The really creepy thing is that Jr. was about 30 years old - when his 100-year old father died.

As I see it, either jail time really mellowed out Soul Brother Number #1, or Strom Jr. is really good at probate law.

Musings on a transcontinental trip on an Amtrak train

I will never again take a transcontinental trip on an Amtrak train. Damn you Lake Shore Limited! Luxurious Viewliner accomodations my ass!!!
There is something eternal about traveling through the Midwest on a winter night. Yeah, the images of a Norman Rockwell painting appear hokey and charmingly ancient and the image of early 20th century small town America is a whitewashed ideal that no one alive remembers firsthand. But the rural midwest I saw from my frosty train window are aware and savvy of how urban America has changed, and yet they adapt slow enough to retain their immediate charm. The single iron lamppost lightling the show gently falling on the tracks at the edge of the station. The small town main streets, selling cell phones and soy-based products from new stores, but still retaining their Victorian-style buildings as they intersect with the tracks. The lone silos and decaying barns out in a icy, fallow field. The Georgian-style farmhouses perserving their families' character and independence. The orchard trees decorated with laces of ice, like a forest of glass trees. Out here, you lose a sense of urgency, and with it, disposability. These structures carry with the the tradition of both grandeur and purpose; they were meant to withstand time and fashion. And long after I passed these small towns and independent farms, I wished that they would continue to persevere long after a string of presidents, appliances, and non-essential celebrities. Although I don't agree with all the thoughts and actions of rural America, I find one of their virtues - endurance - something we are always in short supply.

Perhaps Indiana and Ohio are only meant to be seen in the dark.

After witnessing what northern upstate New York - i.e Buffalo - looks like - broken machinery, disrepaired and abandoned factories and mills, burning tires, polluted rivers, I now realize why two of my closest friends are obsessed with post-apocalyptic dystopian futures. Thunderdome anyone?

I had breakfast in the dining car sharing a table with an electromagnetic physicist from Syracuse and his precocious 5-year old daughter (is there any other?) He seemed interested in how my progression into med school was going, and as someone who was an outside observer, appeared extremely critical of the entire process. His experience was with former students at Syracuse University, including one girl who took the most advanced physics and chemistry classes, but was passed over last year. His conclusion was that medical schools were not looking for the most challenged or the most intelligent candidates, but the most accomplished and best work-ethic (the ones with the best GPAs). If not for the MCATs, I would totally have agreed with him, and even then he made some convincing arguments. I went back over a speech my adviser gave from the outgoing AAMC President in 2005 about how the sorry state of medical admissions treated its American candidates, and realized, I wish that physicist guy would be on my admission board... and maybe my friends.

That's my trip on Amtrak. Never listening to you on transportation advice again, Kevin!